Winter doldrums, life updates

Yeah.

It happens.

We've been around.  I've been around.  I think I just sort of got wrapped up in living life (which has for the most part been wonderful), and surviving this winter while trying to stay busy yet lacking motivation to really do anything super substantial with my time.  Specifically, obviously, I've been lacking the motivation to do any sort of life documentation beyond hitting "share" on Instagram or Facebook.

Ugh.  I have over 3,300 photos on my iPhone, which makes me a little sick to my stomach since I'm guessing at least 70% of them are blurry repeats and need to just be deleted but I haven't kept up on any of that nonsense.

Don't even get me started on my Gmail account.  

(Type A friends, are you feeling twitchy?)

So whatever.  The truth is, like everyone else in Minnesota, I'm cracking up a little after this long winter, and I hate to say it but I've spent too much of the last few months wishing the hours, days, weeks, would just go faster and we could get to the point where we could enjoy some freaking sunshine and fragrant flowers and muddy park time and green grass and burgers on the grill and music on the patio and windows open and iced coffee and donuts while we explore the neighborhood pulling the boys in the wagon.

I mean.  COME ON.

Instead, we've spent a lot of time being adorable and playing in the living room.  (Yes, that includes me, I am insanely adorable these days.)

Lots of time to practice sharing, to learn how to take turns, to work on controlling our emotions and taking deep breaths before expressing our anger in inappropriate ways.

See?!  Totally Kicking A at this "sharing" thing.

(No, I still haven't painted my dining room.  Shut up.)


The hours of 4:00 - 6:00 PM still get dicey every single day, making dinnertime almost ALWAYS a real peachy, fun, relaxed family time in our home.

Gus is majorly into anything that has to do with outer space.  Obsessed with rocket ships, martians, planets, space storms, flying to the moon, and of course Wall-E.

Superheroes, too, have started to become a big part of our life.  He loves to wear his Spider-man and Batman pajamas, and the exciting anticipation of wearing them makes initiating the bedtime process a whole lot easier some evenings.  Three is such a fun age, trying at times, of course, in fact there are almost always going to be trying times throughout each day even, but everything else?  Amazing.  It is so fun to see him become a kid, do kid things, get excited about stuff that I know I personally got excited about when I was a kid.  (Hello, SUPERHEROES!)

And then there's all the learning, the talking, the questions, the insights into his little mind.  He's telling jokes now, sharing these big ideas about what he wants to do, how he's going to do it, what we should be doing, telling us stories, asking questions, initiating games with his little brother that usually involve wrestling or jumping or chasing and almost always end in someone getting hurt.

And yeah, testing boundaries, pushing buttons, throwing fits, coaxing us into power struggles, wearing us down...  That too.  He's talking a lot about feelings these days, telling us quite often how frustrated or angry or sad he is, which, yeah, I'm glad he's understanding those feelings.  I'm relieved he's starting to be able to work things out, it's the reason why we talk so much about feelings, but it also makes my heart ache a little bit.  Because clearly this age is difficult for him as well.

Getting him dressed in the morning is something I dread more than anything else.  He HATES getting dressed and HATES having to participate in the process and almost every day he stalls and wanders around and ignores me when I try to start the process, finds anything else to do to avoid it, even runs away from me and flat out refuses to cooperate.

Gus wearing Louie's coat, which both boys found to be HILARIOUS.
Louie also is seen here chewing on his hands, per usual.  Because TEETHING  Constant.  TEETHING.

I'm trying to encourage him to dress himself, and I know that added pressure is possibly part of the reason he has started to resist even more, but OH MY GOD.  I offer choices, I try to make it fun, I offer rewards, and then when desperation sets in I make empty threats.  It's really quite ridiculous. A few weeks ago, a Monday morning, we didn't really have anything pressing to do or get ready for, other than a quick trip to Target at some point before lunchtime, so I tried to give him the time, no pressure, to do it himself.  When he refused, I went downstairs with Louie to do some chores, told him he could come down when he was dressed and we would then go to Target.  No pressure though, take your time buddy.  If you need help, just ask.

45 minutes later I was not so kumbaya about things.

"At least take your pajamas off yourself!  I'm very frustrated with you.  I'm not coming up until your pajama pants are OFF!  I know you can do it Gus!"  He did eventually do it, removed his pajamas and then with a tiny bit of direction and help, dressed himself, which I was quite relieved to see because I was honestly starting to wonder if there was something wrong with him, if maybe he physically COULDN'T do it.

But he did it, and he was proud of himself, and I do know he struggles with some other fine motor skills so it's something he just needs to keep practicing and working on, and eventually it won't be so difficult.  But I don't have 45 minutes to do this every day.  And there's such a fine line, when we put too much pressure on him, when we don't have time to let him take his sweet time, it just all blows up in our face.  He's the kind of kid that shuts down when something's difficult, wants to give up really quickly.  I can't tell you how often I hear "I can't do it mommy!" which is totally infuriating and disheartening, and I'm not really sure how to encourage him without being pushy and getting annoying.

Because goodness, my patience is running thin.  It is so hard to... just... wait...  But I feel like that's what I have to do.  It will click at some point.   I mean, no one ever went to high school without being able to dress themselves right?  At some point he will do it... right?  (Please.)  Well, we have until next fall for him to at least perfect the whole pants up and down thing, since he'll be going to preschool 3 times a week and they can't/won't be able to help him go to the bathroom.

Yup.  My baby!  Preschool!

I know many 3-year-olds are already in preschool, but Gus has the, in my opinion, good fortune of having an early September birthday, so he'll be basically 4 when he starts preschool, and then he'll do that for 2 full years before going to Kindergarten.  I'm pretty excited, and nervous for him since he doesn't have a lot of experience in such a structured environment, but I think the program we chose will be a good fit for him, and it's in the same building where we attend ECFE classes, so I'm hoping that will make the transition easier on him.  The whole thing still stresses me out, but I loved school so dang much as a kid, I just want him to love it too.  Hoping against hope that he does, and hoping that he has teachers that don't just understand but appreciate rambunctious, sweet, silly boys whom are a little reserved at first with new people and new environments.

And then there's Louie, my insane baby toddler.  He is such a handful, I can't even believe it, but also so perfectly beautiful.  Truly, he is gorgeous, I could just nibble on his little neck and cooch his little belly and inhale his delicious scent all day long.  He is funny and crazy, always smiling his big old cheesy grin, and we just love having him around, he brings so much joy to our lives.

He talks so much, I don't remember how much Gus was talking at this age, but goodness.  Louie never shuts up. Some of it, most of it, is incoherent babbling, coupled with wild and sometimes forceful gestures, but he also knows how to communicate a number of things with actual words.  For months now he's been saying things like, bite and milk when he wants food or drink (if that wasn't clear), and now I swear it's something knew every day.  He says book, mine, up, down, mama and mommy, dada, ball, bye-bye, outside, Bella, puppy, baby, hi, truck, track, sock, hat, night-night (which can mean he wants to either actually go to bed, or he just wants to nurse), banana, rice, grandma, grandpa, and as of yesterday, Wall-E which made me laugh so hard I almost cried.  Oh and he has to have a word for Gus, I know he must, but I haven't figured it out yet.  Need to pay more attention to his incoherent babbling.  And I'm sure he has more words, those were all just off the top of my head.  And I'll add that I do apologize for the boring list, but I don't really keep baby books, (really meaning, at all), so that list is for future me's nostalgic enjoyment.

(Future me, I hope you're appreciating all that sleep you're getting regularly.)  

So I love the crazy cool communication that is going on with this boy, but I could do without some of Louie's patented "eh!-eh!-eh!-eh!" (it is the soundtrack to my current life, on a constant loop in my head) and pointing/reaching/lunging for when he wants something and it's taking me too long to figure out what.  If I remember correctly, this lasts for the better part of this second year, so... awesome.  ;)

What else is Louie into?  Well, besides his brother, and anything he might be doing or playing with at any given time, he's crazy into animals, books, books about animals, animal sounds, balls are still the greatest, peek-a-boo, playing "this little piggy" with his toes, climbing stairs, running around outside in the driveway before we leave to go anywhere, throwing things down the laundry chute, and climbing onto pieces of furniture like chairs and beds, and then yelling, stuck! when he doesn't know how to get down.  

Life with these boys is wild, and I'm so lucky.

Oh, and before I go, this also happened while I've been not writing:

My nephew, my brother's little boy.  Life is crazy awesome.  Now THIS has been fun.  Seeing Ben become a dad.  And poor Michelle, she looks so tired there, after 16 odd hours of un-medicated labor.  But I'm so happy that she was able to get the birth she wanted and prepared for, she is a rock star.  And now a mom.  Though the two sort of go hand in hand, right?

1 year old

I've started writing this a number of times, but nothing seems right, my fingers move on the keys, words spewing... and then.  No.  That's not good enough.  Delete.  Delete.  Erase.

This is big!  This is huge! Louie is one year old!  Be better!  Write better!  I put this bizarre pressure on myself to somehow perfectly capture his essence, to say something profound, to find the words to describe what it means to be this kid's mom.  I want to remember forever who he is, right now, one year into his unwritten life, a life that could go in so many directions, could take him so many places.  There is much promise, much unknown, what will he do?  Who will he be?

Since I became these boys' mother, I look at birthdays so much differently than I used to.  I was not a birthday person, and now, oh you better believe it, I am a birthday person.  We have to celebrate and reflect and be thankful for right now, as we have no idea what tomorrow brings.  And EVERY person, every little boy, should feel special on his birthday because there will never be anyone else like him, ever.

On the night you were born,
The moon smiled with such wonder
That the stars peeked in to see you
And the night wind whispered,
"Life will never be the same."
Because there had never been anyone like you... ever in the world.*

Louie came into our world just a little over a year ago and in doing so, somehow managed to both CHANGE EVERYTHING and also fit right into our little piece of the world like he was exactly what we were missing.  Children seem to do that.  Goodness, how do they do that?  Magic.    

This boy.  He is magic.

He is mine, and I am his.  

And since I'm perpetually late in pretty much every aspect of my life, it's fitting that I would finally write about his birthday ten days late.  

Maybe I should pretend that I did that on purpose.  Okay, yeah, that's what I'm going to do.  

I'm writing today because TODAY is the 1-year anniversary of Louie's actual due date.  I know there will be many more surprises throughout life with this boy, but that was the first one, and it was a shocker.  Ten days early, this kid decided to slip in right before the new year, sort of making that "Big Brother 2012" shirt we put on Gus to announce our pregnancy look pretty darn stupid.  

Ahh well, it's just a funny part of his story, our family's story.

So Louie is one year old, and I can definitively say that doing this thing a second time around is just as special, just as wild, just as fun, and just as difficult.  Well, certainly it's been more difficult, but that's not little Louie's fault, we can place the blame for that on his energetic and very three mop-headed big brother.

At one year old, Louie is just a joy.  He loves music, loves to dance and bop and sway back and forth on his feet, especially while banging on a keyboard or shaking some sort of make-shift instrument like a box of macaroni and cheese.  That smile of his, oh I'm pretty sure sunshine comes out of it, it is infectious and easy and comforting and silly.  

He loves to eat, but already has some very strong opinions on WHAT he eats.  If left to his own devices, surely he would eat cheerios and cheese and frozen waffles for every meal for the rest of his days. Sippy cups and spoons and other utensils are his favorite, he likes choices and he likes control.

Louie is very opinionated, he knows what he wants, wants it now, and yup, he pretty much knows how to get it.  One of his very first words (besides mama, dada, no, and uh-oh) was MINE! (do you think he lives with a 3-year-old?) and when he wants something he points to it and yells MINE! until the adult closest to him figures out what he's pointing at and gives it to him.  It is hilarious, yes, but also somewhat horrifying.  

I am a little amazed by some of the quirks of a second-born kid, he seems to pick things up so quickly, always watching and learning from his big brother.  For example he has been vrooming cars around the house pretty much since he started crawling at 7 months old.  It sort of blew my mind a little, to see a tiny little baby doing something like that.  And he LOVES any Cars movie toy, even though, of course at just one he hasn't actually watched the movie.  He simply knows how important those little characters are to Gus, so those toys are the first he goes after.  Many a brotherly fight has been had over stupid little Mater and Lightening McQueen cars.  Already with the sibling rivalry, and not just on Gus's end!  Louie is quite the little instigator and I love him for it.  

I am thankful for this wonderful year.  Yes, it's been difficult, it's such a cliche but it's the truth, I'm perpetually exhausted, sleep deprived, and I shower about 30% less than I did in 2011.  But all the hard parts are just parts of the whole, which was a perfect year.  Blessed, happy, chaotic, loud, frustrating, peaceful, overwhelming, this year was a gift.  

Louie, we love you so much, and we promise to be there, mom, dad & Gus, this little family is all in it together.  We're ready to find out what's next, excited to be there as you become more and more your own person.  I will be watching you see the world, holding my breath a little as you leave your babyhood behind and need me a little bit less, or at least differently, every single day.  I'm not sad though, because truly I just can't wait to see what's next.    

Happy Birthday my baby Louie.  

*From this book by Nancy Tillman.  It is one of my absolute favorites, and was given to us by Dan's brother and our sister-in-law when Louie was born.

What I’ll remember about Christmas 2012

We had a wonderful holiday season, and I've been too lazy or busy or sick to blog about any of it throughout the last few weeks, so I’ll share a hodgepodge of tidbits and pictures here.  To sum it all up, it was a lot of build up and anticipation (always the best part) that lead to multiple exhausting and fun and sometimes stressful Christmas celebrations with Dan’s and my respective families.  Over the course of four days of celebrations, I over-indulged on peanut butter cups and Swedish meatballs, and wasted a lot of drinks (including those of the alcoholic variety) whilst trying to manage my children amidst the excitement and chaos of presents and toys and sugar and cousins and late bedtimes.  I’m here to say, you tend to lose track of your drink when it feels like you’re constantly being pulled in 50 different directions.  ;)

Every year on Christmas Eve we go to a 4:00 PM service at our church in South Minneapolis.  What I will remember about this year will of course be managing those wily boys of mine for over an hour.  Oooof.  Goodness.  I keep saying I need to start working out again, but at times like these I think I more than likely get enough of a workout just in daily life, being MOM. 

Anyway, normally we bring Gus to the nursery after the “Children’s Message”, which is sort of a little sermon for the kids during which the little ones all run up to the front of the sanctuary and sit on the step in a group listening to Pastor Mark break something down for them.  It’s ADORABLE.  Well, so since it was Christmas Eve and I wasn't even sure if there was a teenager on staff down in the nursery, we kept Gus for the rest of the service, which meant we definitely had our hands full with both him and Louie. 

I find it totally hilarious when Gus tries to remember to whisper, but then all of a sudden forgets and yells out something like, “Oh!  Those mommies are singing songs!” when the choir begins to sing. 

Of course, at some point he announced (rather loudly) that he had to go pee, so I walked him to the restroom. On our way back upstairs, he all of a sudden stopped in his tracks and chirped, “Huh! Oh! I hear sleigh bells!  I hear reindeer!  It’s Santa, he’s up on the roof, let’s go see him!” 

I told him that was probably just everyone else upstairs singing songs, but he wasn't convinced, so I promised that after church was over we would go outside and look up on the roof and see if we could see something. 

But I couldn't help but giggle.  Ha!  Of course, we’re in church, and Gus is talking about Santa.  Figures. 

I’ll also remember this Christmas Eve as the year that we were able to keep Louie happy (enough) until 10 PM when we finally left his great grandma’s house, a good 3 hours past his bedtime.  That feat involved a little 20 minute foray of playing in the basement bathroom, which is… yeah, so random.  He LOOOOOOVED it, immediately went from cranky and closing in on meltdown to gleeful squealing when we took off his little sweater outfit and moccasins and let him roam around on the cold white tile.  As he was standing up to look into the big tub and clapping his hands and laughing hysterically, I was tempted to give him a bath.  He would have been in heaven in there.  It’s just amazing how a little change in scenery does such wonders at this age.   

He wanted in there soooo bad.  Baths are Louie's favorite these days, turning the faucet on insights a stampede into the bathroom at home.

Two trouble-making three year-olds in the bathtub.  

Being in grandma's bathroom makes ALL the children happy!  

Later that evening at home Dan and I were definitely exhausted and dragging our asses at 11:30 after finally getting the kids to bed.  We somewhat begrudgingly shuffled around the living and dining room as we got the Santa presents all set up and the stockings stuffed.  Dan took one for the team and took a couple big bites out of the unwashed, unpeeled, dirty carrot Gus and I had left out for Santa’s reindeer, and after a night full of overindulgence he choked down a few bites of Santa’s cookies.  AND THEN he took a big swig from the glass of soy milk that had been sitting out for over an hour and I gagged a little as it was happening. I had suggested we just pour a little out in the sink but he felt the need to suck it up for some reason.  All in the name of authenticity?  Who knows.

Before the nibbling of dirty vegetables and drinking of warm gross milk.

Impressively, in our exhaustion we also realized that night that we had better do something with the elf so Dan skirted him away in his dresser drawer and we both specifically noted that we NEED TO NOT FORGET ABOUT THAT DAMN ELF when we take down the Christmas tree next weekend and make sure to pack him away in the attic with the rest of the Christmas stuff. 

Of course days after de-Christmasing the house, Dan came to me and whispered that THAT DAMN ELF was still in his dresser.

Oh, and I've gone on and on about Christmas Eve, but I forgot about one of the first things we did that day… bring Gus to the Minute Clinic.  Ugh.  Oh and it was just the beginning of the wretchedness that would overtake our household for the majority of the week

. 

We are so hesitant to take the kids to the doctor for things like little colds, it has to get pretty bad for me to make that leap because every time we go it seems to be either absolutely nothing (an expensive nothing where I get to listen to sound medical advice that revolves around administering Tylenol or putting a humidifier in the room or rubbing Vicks on the child’s chest… thank you for that Doctor!), or we end up making things worse on ourselves by getting some antibiotic that causes a reaction or later contributes to thrush.  It’s just… well, I’m not a fan.

But by Christmas Eve morning he had pretty much lost his voice, and his breathing had started to sound labored, which really freaked us out.  It was starting to seem so much worse than a simple virus, and the next day was Christmas so we didn't want to back ourselves into a corner. 

So this nurse practitioner at the CVS Minute Clinic prescribed an antibiotic and diagnosed Gus with a sinus infection, something I've since learned children under 5 don’t get because their sinus cavities aren't really even developed yet.  Nice.  THAT is what we get for going to a Minute Clinic.  (By the way, and this is ironic, Dan and Gus spent TWO HOURS waiting to see that misinformed nurse practitioner.  MINUTE clinic, huh?!  ARGH!)

Shit sort of hit the fan as far as the boys and their virus on Christmas day (did I mention Louie had it too), but we didn't really realize it was as bad as it was until Gus was crying for me to hold him all evening at my parents’ house, complaining of aches and pains in his back.  Louie didn't seem to be suffering from much other than being overtired and a pretty drippy nose, but he was also losing it come evening, to the point of  hysterics if I wasn't within eye-sight. 

We got through a horrible dinner during which I snapped at my mom, who was the only person trying to help us yet I can’t seem to help myself from being a complete pill to her when I’m stressed out.  All I wanted was to go home, but I knew my mom didn't want us to leave, it’s Christmas and it’s her family and we wanted to be there IN THEORY, but for real. NO.  I just wanted to go home and put my sad sick children to bed and sit down for the first time in three hours. 

So we attempted to soldier on, in the name of Christmas.  Plan B.  Dan shoved food down his throat and I tried to keep the children happy while he ran home to get some children’s Tylenol.  When he got back we got medicine in Gus and turned on a movie in my parents’ room so he could snuggle and be comfortable away from the noise of the rest of the party.  Then I got Louie down for the night (or so I thought) in the next room and finally went downstairs to try to talk with people and enjoy Christmas with my extended family a little. 

And then not twenty minutes later I hear Louie start having a coughing fit, and then it sounds like he’s gagging and then I run up there and check for puke in the crib, pick him up and try to soothe him, and he starts gagging again as he’s coughing and ends up puking all over me. 

Poor baby.  I pat his back, try to sooth him, and he just keeps coughing it up, more and more phlegm-y vomit.  When it was all over, the poor boy is just spent, lying on my chest whimpering, and we’re both covered in puke. 

I looked at Dan and almost started crying. 

“Let’s go home.” 

So that was Christmas day.  Not great, but memorable. 

I won’t leave things here, cause that is just a major buzz kill.  Instead… a bajillion iPhone photos!

This baby is obsessed with that keyboard in his brothers room.  Pounds on it like a maniac while dancing and bopping.  It's hilarious..

The holidays wear him out.

Brunch at my parents with my brothers and their families on the Saturday before Christmas.  We got to spend a whole day together again, loving this tradition.

We are growing.  Added Eric this year, and next year will be Ben and Michelle's little one (due in March!).  I think my parents even have stockings for the grand-dogs, which is somewhat ridiculous.

My mom was border-line out-of-control this year with the presents.

Gus spilled orange juice all over himself during brunch.  Thus... the back-up pants from the diaper bag come out.

Pretty sure these two made out better than anyone, my mom was intent on buying them every kitchen appliance and utensil she could find at Costco for a good deal.

These two little rubber balls from his and Gus's stockings were definitely Louie's FAVORITE gifts this year.

The only pictures of me are always selfies.  That hair is getting cut and colored TOMORROW!  It's about damn time.  It's been.... well since I was on maternity leave with Louie.  Those roots and ends are not pretty.

My mom found this dollhouse and a huge box of furniture and accessories on Craigslist for $65.  AMAZING deal.  So far Gus only plays with it if I play with him, he's just so all about cars and trucks and things that move.  But we're working on it.  I love it at least!  ;)

Louie was obsessed with the Christmas tree, he spent so much time sitting at it, or standing even, taking ornaments off, trying to put them back on, batting at it like a cat.  It was very cute, and thankfully he never attempted anything too crazy, mostly just tinkered and looked at it in awe.

We opened presents as a little family together on Christmas Eve morning, when we realized we had no idea when we were going to do that.  We need to come up with a plan and call it tradition and stick to it.  We forget a little bit about fitting in our own family time amidst all the craziness of the holiday.

A shot of the skyline on Christmas Eve, on the way home from church.

I loved Louie's little elfin outfit on Christmas Eve.

Nom!  He ate his weight in great grandma's scalloped corn.  Something other than Cheerios or waffles!  A Christmas MIRACLE!

They are cute.  And I took about 20 pictures of them trying to get at least ONE in which they were both standing still and looking somewhat in my direction.  It probably says a lot that this was the best one.  Ugh.

Louie with his younger cousin Matthew.  20 seconds later Louie swiped at Matthews face and made him cry.  :(

Dan's grandma has an amazing playroom in her basement.

Abby's Christmas dress is the bomb.  A poofy full skirt is the makings of a good Christmas dress.

Pianos are his favorite.

The Christmas jammies come out.

I love my new iPhone so much, my old EVO would have never gotten such a beautiful shot of this girl.

All 7 grandchildren (or great-grandchildren).

Attempting a matching jammies picture in front of the tree on Christmas Eve at 10:30 PM was not the smartest idea I've ever had.

Gus and I miserable (him sick, me exhausted from taking care of sick children) on Christmas at my parents' house.

We had Christmas with just Dan's immediate family at his parents' house the Saturday AFTER Christmas, and these two crazy fools were at it again.  There are very few photos because by this time Dan and I had both caught the boys colds, so I was walking around like a zombie all night.  My 12 year old sister-in-law came over and thanked me for the gift and I couldn't even hide the fact that I had NO IDEA what I gave her.  I was a mess, though thankfully we were both mostly through it in time for Louie's birthday on Monday.  And that will hopefully be in another post...

Kids being kids, hyping out over new toys.

And these ones aren't really from Christmas, but the last few weeks all sort of jumble together in my mushy brain now.  So much time at home, so much time in pajamas, so much time laying on the floor in sick agony as these boys jumped on the furniture and acted like caged wild beasts.

I can appreciate it all in hindsight, and isn't that why we take pictures?  

Back into the swing of things

So yeah, I needed a little break there from blogging, if only to feel like I could just sit and do nothing at the end of the day.  That has been wonderfully freeing for the last two weeks, but I've also found myself succumbing deeper and deeper into the throws of laziness and comfort eating after the kids bedtime.  Not to mention the fact that the number of Hallmark channel holiday movies I've watched is embarrassing   

In case you're wondering, Matchmaker Santa has so far been my favorite, search for it and set your DVR for some badly acted, mindless, yet addicting holiday romance!  This one stars Lacey Chabert a.k.a. Claudia from Party of Five as a sweet girl who of course owns her own bakery, because any girl who as a child likes to bake Christmas cookies with her mom will clearly go on to run her own successful store someday!  Don't let the opening flashback scene put you off, it's so painfully bad that I nearly changed the channel.  Here's an idea, start it and then use that first five minutes to go pour yourself a glass of wine and assemble your gift wrapping materials.

If Matchmaker Santa wets your appetite for more cheese, (as it did for me, because at this point I am RAVENOUS for sappy but not too sappy made-for-TV holiday movies, to the point of spending thirty precious child-free minutes the other night scrolling through upcoming Hallmark/Lifetime/ABC Family evening line-ups) then you might like Holiday Engagement, a fresh take on the classic tale of hiring a fake fiance to bring home for the holidays!  I kid, of course, but on second thought, I have seen a number of movies with fake fiance story-lines.  What is that about?

Moving on from my sad little hobby of watching crappy TV, to something even more random.  So I really love these candy cane leggings I saw on the Lands End site when I was doing some holiday shopping, super adorable and I would just love to lounge around the house in them sipping cocoa and watching, well, Hallmark movies of course.  But they are $50, for a pair of pants that you should probably not leave the house in.  That's just not right.

But the best part?

Look at how Lands End has styled these pants.

You have got to be kidding me.

They've got this girl in what are essentially draw-string pajama pants, wearing a t-shirt AND a chambray button-up TUCKED-IN to the pajama pants, and then they throw a giant wool slouchy cardigan sweater over it all.

Yeah, that looks super cozy.  Pshhhh.

I made these amazing 7-layer bars from Annie's Eats last night for a cookie exchange with friends on Friday, SO EXCITED!  I am totally geeked about the holidays this year, love every single thing about this season, even though I'm no where near done with my shopping.  That won't stress me out until the week before Christmas, so there's still plenty more time to procrastinate.

We are though, I think, doing a better job about not going overboard buying gifts for Gus this year.    However my attempt to buy just one thing for each kid in the categories of 1.) something to wear, 2.) something to play with, and 3.) something to read has been a major FAIL already.  (I was inspired by you Erin, and your want, need, wear, read gift-giving categories last year, and I TRIED, I swear! Sort of.  It was a half-assed attempt to control myself.)

It's just so hard because I love buying things and especially giving gifts SO MUCH.  But still, we're scaling back, and I think it's good.  Too many presents is just a waste of money, they fill up our house with clutter, and they make Gus kind of greedy and demanding, when one or two special, well-thought out things make him appreciative and excited.

Which kid sounds more fun to be around?  And which kid is learning the right things about what this holiday is about?

We all know the answer to those questions.

Oh, and as you can sort of see in the above picture, I've committed myself to painting the dining room very soon by painting a number of squares of different grays all over the room.  (Choosing paint colors is SO HARD!)  Also we currently have three different curtains hanging on the three windows in that room as I try to make a decision on paint.  In full disclosure, there are four more different cast-away curtains in a bag to be returned. I am trying so so hard to make some design decisions that I will be able to stick with for more than a few years, and consequently our dining room looks INSANE right now.  Eh.