These past few weeks have not been super awesome. It all started when Gus got some sort of strange flu virus or something a few Saturdays ago. That morning we had driven up to Dan's grandparents' home north of Brainerd to spend the day and have a Thanksgiving meal. It wasn't until we got there that he started complaining of body aches, stomach pain, and then he proceeded to spend the entire day loafing on the couch, taking naps, acting sad, eating nothing, and generally being very much not himself. Poor guy. We never took his temperature but he seemed a little warm so I'm guessing he had a slight fever. The next day he seemed a lot better so we went on with our day as planned, we had a family member's Confirmation at church to go to, and then lunch at Dan's brother's afterwards. Gus would have been devastated to miss out on going to his "best friend Lucas's house", so we were really glad he seemed better. That day he ate next to nothing and was still not 100%, though a little more himself, but then Monday morning he woke up barely able to function again, and then had a random puking spell after gagging on Tylenol. (Are my kids the only ones that truly refuse to allow me to get that stuff down their throats without it coming back up?) So of course I kept him home from preschool which meant Louie would have to miss ECFE and then the next day we kept them both home from daycare after Gus had a strange bout of "tummy issues" in the middle of the night.
So a super screwed up weekend and beginning of the week for sure, and then about a week later, this past Sunday, I ended up with whatever he had. I thought it was more of my pregnancy drama at first, but yup. The next morning it took every single ounce of energy and willpower I could muster to get us out of the house and get Gus to preschool, on the way to which I called Dan tearfully begging him to come home if he was at all able because I didn't know how I was going to survive the day. Four days later and I'm still suffering from whatever this is. And it just... sucks. I feel nauseous and light-headed when I don't eat, and sick to my stomach when I do. It feels vaguely like I'm in the first trimester again, with a few other fun symptoms thrown in there. Yaaaaay!
I made it all day at work yesterday, definitely rallied somehow, but today was just not good. I called it after an hour and a half in the office and came home to rest while I could with the boys still at daycare. Thank goodness for daycare, truly the bright spot in a sick working parent's life.
All this to say that I am tooootally in a "woe is me" frame of mind and I can't quite remember what it feels like to feel normal and on top of it all I'm also just feeling so dang pregnant all I can think about is that day in the future when I no longer have to be pregnant again. But you guys, that is sooooo far away! February 20th? Are you kidding me? I am ready now. Yesterday. I moped around the house a few nights ago nagging Dan, "Never again! I am never letting you do this to me again, I am DONE being pregnant."
Talk about dramatic.
I think I can, I think I can.
Last night I had very vivid dreams of being in labor, being at the hospital, and it was so real and entirely unnerving because I woke up nervous, thinking maybe I really am in labor, and this is way too soon obviously, so I sat in bed waiting to see if the contractions came back. I walked around a little bit, went to the bathroom. No. Just a dream. It felt SO REAL though.
Hilariously, in my dream, everyone and their mother was at the hospital with me while I was laboring and getting ready to push. Both my parents and both of my in-laws, friends, random acquaintances, just... like everyone. All there for the big show, it seemed. Ha... no thank you.
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and then this weekend we're cutting down our tree and decorating the house and doing all that fun stuff, so I'm really hoping Dan and Louie don't go down per the schedule that this bug has seemed to have. It feels a bit like a ticking time-bomb but I really am thankful that Dan and I haven't both been sick at the same time because there is no worse hell than both parents being down for the count.
Other exciting things have been happening though, most notably... we potty trained Louie! Well, sort of. The number 2 thing is still not happening where it should be happening and that has made for some fun times, but really, he has just done so well and it didn't take him very long to catch on, and he was telling us he had to go and running to the potty on like day 3-4. Kind of amazing. He's stayed dry all day at daycare the past few weeks and the only accidents have, like I said, been of the other variety. (So gross.) It will come in time. Oh, and for the record, potty training is just as fun as I remembered! ;)
This past Friday we had my parents and my brother and his family over for dinner (realllly hoping I didn't infect them all before I knew I was sick...) and we watched Return of the Jedi with the boys. We watched the original Start Wars (Episode IV) a few months back when Nathan was in town and it's pretty evident Gus is on track to grow up to be a big Star Wars/comic book nerd like both of my brothers. That stuff is sooooo not in Dan's wheel-house, certainly more in mine, and it has been just a joy experiencing it all with him for the first time, and kind of fun and nostalgic for my brothers to be a part of it too. Louie, of course, is definitely too young for this stuff, but he picks up on things very quickly and wants to do everything his big brother does. It is hilarious to hear him talking non-stop about his love for Chewbacca.
We spent the day at home on Saturday, and in the afternoon, before we were off to a movie with a big group of our friends (and a sleepover for the kids at my parents!), my friend Lisa came over to take photos of us for our Christmas cards. Magically, Satruday was like a bright spot of a warm day in what has been just frigidly cold weather for the past few weeks, so we were able to take a few outside. They turned out really great, it was a very casual thing, a "no pressure, all we need is ONE picture!" kind of deal, but she took some gems and the boys were pretty cooperative (i.e. bribed with skittles). Here are some of my favorites:
Could these children get any cuter? (Louie doesn't usually wear gloves, he very much does not seem to know what to do with his hands in these photos, and it is making me giggle.)
Happy Thanksgiving! I am thankful for these boys of mine and this baby girl I am so fortunate to be carrying. I don't often acknowledge how truly grateful I am for this gift, because it's been hard, and if I'm really honest, not super fun to be pregnant. But worth it? For sure. And do I know how lucky I am to get to be a mom all over again for another little one? For sure. I am thankful for the most incredibly patient and loving and giving partner to do this with, he has been so kind and caring with me over the last few days (months) when I've certainly not been a peach to be around, and he's taken over all of the heavy lifting of parenting and cooking and just in general has been willing to play the role of the level-headed parent that we all needed in this household while I've been on a bit of a crazy train.
And gosh darn it I am so thankful for Thanksgiving dinner, which I want so badly to enjoy tomorrow, so cross your fingers that this day of rest is all I really need to kick this thing and be able to enjoy stuffing my face tomorrow with the most delicious of foods.